Life's a Bitch

As much as I hate to complain (alright, perhaps I like to complain, although I hate the amount of complaining that comes from me -- does that make any sense?), one of my biggest problems in life is not getting due recognition. I'm not talking about being under-appreciated or unloved; I'm talking about fame levels.


Most folks, after they've known me for a little while, know that I would absolutely love to be recognized for my vocal talent and social vision. The view that "people are people are people" (or something similar to such) is a rather common one, although it's not brought into practice enough. A lot of the material that I write (and aspire to write) involves that view. If there were any one dream that I could have become a reality, it would be for my thoughts, ideas and honest love for people and their well-being to come to fruition.

While it's quite true that I don't generally enjoy having others around me, it is also true that I honestly and genuinely love people -- while I tend to resent the ignorant and hateful things that some can do to one another and themselves, I realize at the same time that I am also nothing more than human. We all err, some more than others, although nobody should really keep track. One of the beliefs that has made my relationship with Marco (and his with me) so strong is communication - "if it's on my mind it's out my mouth" - and many folks forget that an open dialogue is absolutely essential to your happiness. Communication is key if you truly hope for others to know how you feel and improve the situations that surround you.

As for how communication relates to my wish to be famous, I feel that the subject matter in my songs and poems would open the hearts of many people while challenging their own beliefs. While not all of my material is so thoughtful (I would refer to a good portion of it as "bubble gum" or "of no real emotional value"), much of it refers to my frustration (a feeling I believe is shared by a likely 90% or better of the world's population) with intolerance and hate that seems to be taking over the world that we live in. Simply being honest with oneself about your opinions challenges you to validate them -- if we were all completely honest with ourselves that we are all imperfect, flawed, and judgmental, perhaps this world will someday become a more peaceful and loving one.

All in all, however, it might just be that I am not destined to fame. Generally speaking though, I just don't believe that anything is predetermined. While everything is somehow interconnected -- you all know about the "9 degrees of Bacon" game about how we all kind of know Kevin Bacon in some round about way (or how ever many steps it is - I'm not sure, honestly) -- I simply can't give up my dream of someday becoming a voice for peace and hope.

I apologize for the ramble-ly-ness of this post (I'm inebriated again, imagine that).... Hopefully I will soon have an audio clip available to demonstrate my so-called talent and be able to share it with you all. I still haven't been able to recover my own writings - I think they may have gotten lost in the never-ending void of virtual memory - but I will likely be recording my own version of Etta James's "At Last" soon. It's been some time since I've actually "sang" it for recording, but I have faith that I'll figure out how to make it sound good enough.

As always, thanks for reading, and I hope you, my lovely reader, are doing well.